OCTOBER IS AWARENESS MONTH: "He who knows others is wise. He who knows himself is enlightened."~Lao Tzu

Riiiight...? Uh no.  Life would be so much simpler if memes like this were true. Memes provide temporary relief through lightheartedness or sarcasm or humor. We all love 'em... well most of us do.

The month of October is a month of AWARENESS that covers many themes:

• October is Down Syndrome Awareness Month!
• October is National Spina Bifida Awareness Month
• October is National Information Literacy Awareness Month
• Breast Cancer Awareness Month
• National Apple Month
• National Physical Therapy Month
• Eye Safety and Injury Prevention Month
• NOW, THEREFORE, I, BARACK OBAMA, President of the United States of America, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Constitution and the laws of the United States, do hereby proclaim October 2013 as National Domestic Violence

And the one I endlessly promote, Pit Bull Awareness Month.

Are we feeling AWARE yet? This doesn't even include the awareness weeks or days that also take place during the month of October. I probably even missed a few. I definitely have a theme going this month and it's been across the board - professionally, personally, even romantically - which brought me to the questions about awareness:

Are you about to RUIN it for everyone else?

OR

Will your actions make it BETTER for everyone else?

Does "everyone else" even matter to you?  In my mind, they do and call it non-youthful wisdoem but with time and experience comes clarity and with wisdom comes compassion as I wholeheartedly ascribe to this quote by Robert Baden-Powell:

"Leave this world a little better than you found it."

So although I would like to announce and promote a national campaign called "Quit Ruining it for Everyone Else Awareness Month," (week or day), let's just discuss it here. I could elaborate with anecdotal instances and experiences as examples of what I am speaking to, but I think we can all muster up our own examples along with feelings of being slighted, ignored, overlooked, unheard or blatantly being disregarded that leave you feeling frustrated or lashing out. The bottom line is that as humans we seek fairness; that things need to just, equitable, honest, upright, honorable, trustworthy. So let me pause and ask that instead of pointing fingers at your colleagues, your co-workers, your volunteers or your family members, I am going to ask that you instead reflect inward.  It's a difficult concept to truly grasp and put into place, but consider the only person whom you have control over and sit with this for a moment;

Only YOU are responsible for YOUR choices.

Choices have consequences not only for the choice-makers but those who are affected by those choices.  I have learned, sometimes painfully, sometimes at the expense of my own ego, to

STOP.

THINK.

(usually) BREATHE.

Then ACT (or not) upon the answers I've gained through posing those questions above to myself.

Once you gain clarity (and IMAGINE if everyone else gained the same type of clarity) how much easier our business and personal dealings would become?

We can all try to be a little more AWARE, right?

BLOG POST AUTHORED BY: Julie Miller, President of Lady Luck Consulting
 

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The hands that help are holier than the lips that pray. ~ Robert Green Ingersoll

If one is sincere about wanting to help (and most of us are when we do), it makes more sense to offer specific help rather than just to make a general offer.

We've all heard it.
We've all said it.

"Let me know if you need anything."

In personal matters this can make you feel even more overwhelmed than the reason (or look on your face) that prompted the person to make this offer. People don't normally say this randomly, it's usually prompted by a rant, venting session or an obvious need for assistance.  "Letting someone know if you need anything" requires more work to already burdened mood; then you have come up with a list (whether written or mental) of the things that need to get done so you can FIND something in order to TELL someone what they CAN do to help. When your head is already spinning, the last thing you want to do is analyze what someone who's offered help can do to decrease your load, so most of usually say
                                       "Thanks, but I'm..."

In business, it's downright frustrating especially if you're a Type A, let's get this sh*t done (like yours truly). I'm going to return to using personal life examples in an attempt to make my point as most of us can relate to those best.

If you've joined a committee, whether it be a sports team, moms group or PTA, you know the circles those quick meetings can potentially spin into, fast, and you end the session wondering if anything was truly accomplished. I hate that feeling because you showed up to help and left a little more confused than when you arrived for volunteer duty.

When working within a volunteer organization, your business dealings, hell even friendships it is extremely helpful to be very specific.

If you genuinely have help to offer try...

"Let me pick up the ice cream cake on the way to the party. 

Will you make sure to pay for it before I arrive?" 

You have offered help with a specific task you're aware needs fulfilling, you've set a boundary for your offer and explained that you're not in a position to foot the bill. Plus you're driving right by Baskin Robbins on your way up to the party AND have offered relief by eliminating one less, time sensitive task for the hostess.

"I've got fifty extra bucks in my wallet, hand me your grocery list. 

I'll be back in 20 minutes."

You went by your buddy's house who's down in the dumps over his recent divorce. You see empty containers of Cup O' Soup on the counter and spoiled milk in the fridge. You've got a little time and money to spare to help a friend out, especially knowing it's his weekend with his kids. Don't ask. Just tell, then do. Done.

"I'm going to be at the (_______) at 2 pm anyway, I'll pick up your kids today. 

Should I drop them off at your house or...?"

You notice the kids of the mom, who recently had to return to full time job, always being the last ones to be picked up from school. You know times are tough and you're there every day, on time, to pick up your two in the car you own that seats eight. I'm not suggesting you become a free bus service or offer free day care, but if you know you're helping out someone during a rough transition, don't offer vague help ("Sorry things are so rough, let me know if you need anything!"), instead offer minor, specific relief. Now if mom shows up with the smell of cocktails on her breath about four hours later, don't make this offer twice, but you may want to speak to the school counselor.


If you're the person in need (or in charge) state clearly:

"I need three people to set up the snack booth at the football game on Friday nights, two to set up one to tear down. There are two two-hour shifts at the home games. Please check the (sport's) calendar and sign up for one or both shifts."

I love being on the receiving end of requests like these and, quite frankly, I reply more quickly than I would to a request for volunteers with only a date mentioned for fear I may have volunteered all of my Friday nights away (again).

"ABC Corp donated (______) last year to (your group) and you, Johnny, work right next door. Could you please go by on Tuesday and confirm that we can count on them again this year?"

One simple, convenient task instead of a long list that every looks at and passes on to the person sitting next to them with a shoulder shrug.


Now let's do an example at work:

"Board members are coming in Tuesday. Order lunch for ten under $150. Delivered by noon to east conference room. Put it on (corporate officer)'s expense account."

I can't begin to tell you how many execs say "order a nice lunch" without any of the details, leaving you to wonder if it's too elaborate, too expensive, too cheap or even enough food.

It's pretty simple yet we all fall victim to this trap with our I'd-LOVE-to-helps and our let-me-know-if-you-need-anythings.

The moral of this story is BE SPECIFIC.

"No problem can be solved until it is 

reduced to some simple form." ~John Pierpont Morgan

BLOG POST AUTHORED BY: Julie Miller, President of Lady Luck Consulting

 

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"Give people the opportunity to be kind, they will be." ~Julie Miller-Hernandez

I occasionally quote myself, yes: Give people the opportunity to be kind, they will be.

volunteerism noun

(Sociology) the principle of donating time and energy for the benefit of other people in the community as a social responsibility rather than for any financial reward

charitable adjective

- generous in giving to the needy

- kind or lenient in one's attitude towards others

benevolent adjective

intending or showing goodwill; kindly; friendly

If I had to write down in order, my favorite type of work it would go something like this:
1. Writing (which I don't find nearly enough time to do lately)
2. Fundraising
3. Public Speaking (I've never really been called "shy")
4. Product procurement (Research and development really - ask me everything you ever wanted to know about bobblehead production... go ahead)
5. Public Relations (They always told me "sit down and be quiet, Julie" - it just never sunk in)
6. Marketing (The artistic gene passed through me to my children, nieces and nephews, but the creativity gene did not)
7. Reputation Management (Don't you be talkin' 'bout my friend like that!)
8. Social Media Management (Where there's a will, there's a PROPER way)

For those of you who know me, this might surprise you, maybe not. Some of you might be thinking "I really could care less what you enjoy doing, Julie, did you finish that project's first draft yet?" I have had the opportunity of doing nearly all of the above on a regular basis since I began my business several years ago; on a much busier scale over the past year which I am very grateful for. I had the pleasure earlier this year of watching my daughter perform in Annie Get Your Gun which, ironically or maybe interestingly, has a song that relates to this blog:  "Doin' What Comes Natur'lly."

I also recently read an article about up and coming professions as well as professions on the outs which I found interesting considering I have a few good friends out of work right now whom have had to rediscover themselves; one has taken free workshops through the county as a resource to become gainfully employed again.  In our mid-forties we are competing with young, ambitious, freshly and highly educated candidates vying for the same employment opportunities, having either come out of a four-year college or with a masters degree in hand; although nothing guarantees you a six figure job. I have friends using government programs to pay their mortgages right now. Times are tough. I was thankful to see my line of work on the "up and coming" list of the article.

Business consulting comes naturally to me, especially in the non-profit sector, yet I hesitate to call myself a "business consultant" because I'm not confident nor arrogant enough not to know that there aren't brilliant minds out there and firms that are full of them. I love to brainstorm and I do have enough experience in enough areas to know a few things about a few things, so if you give me a moment of your time you might also have the opportunity of being entertained by someone who can rattle of marketing strategies and business concepts without pausing to take a breath.

So I thought about it and decided to blog about what it is that I actually do on a daily basis in the thoughts that some of you might be seeking a new line of work; like my friend who made pretty good money, had benefits, 401k, a desk with a nice view, regular hours and is now researching the best resources for someone who's near poverty and hanging on by a desperate thread to their home. This brings me to my original point: VOLUNTEERING.

My son asked me a question at the dinner table the other night; that conversation went a little something like this:

"Mom, why do you volunteer so much? Maybe you could get a job-job and make more money."

"because I think I must have been a serial killer in a past life and I'm trying to straighten out my karma." 

All joking aside, I have raised my kids in a charitable home where we, as a family, have actively volunteered since before they could walk. My kids have been raised to give of their time, their energy, their talents and their earnings. In fact, it began when they were little-littles as I have required, among the members of our family, that we donate to charity, at minimum, twice a year: right before our birthdays and right before Christmas. Because there is someone who always has less than we do.  I have been known to say "You want to fix a bought of depression?  Think of someone else, besides yourself."  My suggestions frequently include serving breakfast to homeless neighbors at your local food pantry, going over to the local animal shelter to walk dogs that may not see another day of sunshine, give up one Saturday to volunteer for your local community beautification project and rake some leaves to feel a healthy release of endorphins from a little extra physical activity. Good for your body, good for your soul.

To be charitable is a way of life that has worked well for me.  Not only as an example for my children, their friends and the next generation, but as a way of life that I've transformed, inadvertently, into a career.  I love chatting about fund raising; I enjoy learning of the stories of so many who have less yet deserve so much more.  And I wholeheartedly believe in the theory of raising funds five dollars at a time. Who among us cannot afford to skip their Starbuck's one morning? Who cannot afford to pack a sack lunch instead of drive-thru on Wednesdays? Who cannot afford to spare what we can usually find at the bottom of our purse or stuffed into the dark depths of our sofa cushions?  Who on earth cannot spare five dollars?  Five dollars multiplied by one hundred... times 1000. You can do the math.

What I have experienced throughout my years of charitable contributions and volunteer man-(*ahem* WOMAN)-hours is that I have yet not to gain one at least one of the following:
1. a new skill

2. a new contact

3. a new client
3. a new friend
4. self esteem

Little do you know, that next job offer you're so desperately seeking may come from the time you spent volunteering at your favorite organization.

Give more, whine less.

BLOG POST AUTHORED BY: Julie Miller, President of Lady Luck Consulting

 

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